Inside every older lady is a younger lady — wondering what the hell happened.
Cora Harvey Armstrong

Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut her up with cookies.

The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
Helen Hayes (at 73)

I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.
Janette Barber

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
Lily Tomlin

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.
Carrie Snow

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.
Laurie Kuslansky

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being, hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
Erma Bombeck

Old age ain’t no place for sissies.
Bette Davis

A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. A woman must do what he can’t.
Rhonda Hansome

The phrase “working mother” is redundant.
Jane Sellman

Every time I close the door on reality, it comes in through the windows.
Jennifer Unlimited

Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
Charlotte Whitton

Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
Caryn Leschen

I try to take one day at a time — but sometimes several days attack me at once.
Jennifer Unlimited

If you can’t be a good example — then you’ll just have to be a horrible warning.
Catherine

I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb — and I’m also not blonde.
Dolly Parton

If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.
Sue Grafton

I’m not going to vacuum ’til Hoover makes one you can ride on.
Roseanne Barr

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country..
Elayne Boosler

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
Maryon Pearson

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man.
If you want anything done, ask a woman.
Margaret Thatcher

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.
Gloria Steinem

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
Eleanor Roosevelt